Happy Birthday, John Boy! I can't believe you're already five years old!!
What a year it's been since I wrote your last birthday letter. I can barely wrap my mind around what to say to you today! When I think about you John, and I think about what this last year has been like for you and for our family, I am once again in awe of your sensitive spirit. You can be headstrong and stubborn and the most obstinate of children! But you are just as often the sweetest child alive! And you have an understanding beyond your years. I remember watching you when your Dad and I had to tell you and your sisters that Luke wasn't going to live for much longer. I worried so much about how your young mind would take that news. But instead of panic and fear, I saw a calm understanding settle over you. And you remained that way for the weeks before Luke passed. The night he left us, you were so sweet and gentle in holding his precious body...giving him kisses and telling him you'd see him soon. And I will never for all my life forget the moment you realized that Luke was gone from you. It broke your heart completely, and I didn't know that I could bear to watch you suffer that pain. But as I explained that Luke would always be near you, you faithfully accepted that. You have missed your brother so much in the time he's been away. But for as much as you miss him, you are very aware of how much I miss him. There was one day when I couldn't keep my emotions in check, and I just started sobbing on the couch. You came up to me and just put your arms around me and let me cry. I told you after I had calmed down that you had done exactly the right thing. That whenever you see a woman crying, just put your arm around her and let her cry. You don't have to talk or try to fix it...just be there. I didn't realize at the time the impression that would make on you. But you have NEVER failed to drop whatever you're doing if you see me crying and come and put your arms around me. And it's always the best comfort for me. :)
You've been very aware lately that you're the only boy around now. Well, the only human boy. :) Maese has been every bit the boy's best friend for you! You love that puppy fiercely, and he returns the affection. You two really are adorable! From the very first weeks he was in our home, I would find you cuddled up on the floor with him. You're the first to get him out of his crate in the morning, and the first to get him when we come home from being out. I'm so glad you have Maese as a best bud! But even though they're girls, you are still best friends with your sisters. You hate when they're at school all day, and ask over and over again how much longer until they get home. You still spend at least half of your time picking on them and generally making their lives miserable. :) But you also have times when you're feeling cooperative...and those are the time I love to watch the three of you play. You and your sisters will always share a special relationship, and I'm confident that you will strengthen that relationship as you grow.
We've continued to work off and on with your speech over the last year. Luckily for both of us, you've continued to improve despite my sporadic efforts. :) As we've conquered the easier aspects of your difficulties, we've had to move on to the more fine-tuning part and you've found that rather frustrating. But we'll get there. Your Dad and I decided to give you another year before kindergarten, so you'll be enjoying your last year at the preschool as the oldest kid in the whole school! You'll be a great help to your Grandma, I'm sure. You know all your sounds, letters, and numbers already...so by the time you get to kindergarten next year you're going to be totally set! You're learning how to play better with boys your age, especially when you're one-on-one. We've noticed during your times playing that you are incredibly competitive! You're a natural athlete in a lot of ways, and we're anxious to see how you do with a team sport when the time comes for that. You started swimming lessons early in the summer, and your first session did NOT go well. You were terrified, and completely unwilling to participate. But we signed you back up, and you did so much better! By the end of the summer, I couldn't believe how much better you were doing. It taught me just how able you are, and that it works better to let you get there on your own rather than me forcing you. Who would have thought? :)
You still love Primary, and believe it or not you're always the most reverent in your class! I still haven't figured that out. :) But I'm happy for it! For obvious reasons, you love discussing the Spirit World and what it's like there. You especially love singing Primary songs before bed, and some of your favorites right now are "I Love To See The Temple" and "Come, Follow Me". I have enjoyed watching you grow in your testimony of Jesus Christ and your understanding of the gospel.
You still have a special relationship with your Dad, and you increasingly need him to be a boy with you. You love playing the Wii with him, and as the football season is gearing up you love talking BYU Football with him. You two are so much alike, and sometime you butt heads because of it. But the relationship you have is real, and I know it will help you grow to be the man of God you're meant to be. You and I...well, we're still buds. You are still my Mama's Boy! Every night before bed, you have me sing your baby song to you. When I say "I love my Johnny Boy, oh yes I do" you sing with me, but you change the words to "I love my Katie Girl, oh yes I do". It is the cutest thing I've ever heard, and by far my most favorite nickname. :)
Oh Johnny, I could go on and on and on! You're such a delight! Your Dad and I are so proud of you, and we are so grateful that you are in our family. I'm so glad that you're excited for our new baby to get here...I've needed that excitement from you as I try to wrap my head around what's happening. :) I hope this year is a bit less crazy than the last, and I'm excited to see how you'll grow and mature during that time. Happy Birthday, John Boy! We love you tons!!
Love,
Mom
